I woke up this morning still feeling pretty much miserable. Not as bad as yesterday, but still bummed out. I have so much work to do to re-arrange schedules, time off work, FMLA requests, short term disability applications, etc. Work that I've already done.
I very much appreciate everyone who is trying to keep me positive. You all have made some very good points on examples of how things happen for a reason. I am also a believer of that, despite my horribly negative attitude at the moment. And I know that once I am cut, re-routed, sewn up, and healing, I will be able to see the logic a little more clearly and I know I will be thankful. I'm not in a depression that I can't get out of, I am choosing to be this way for the time being. Sometimes I just get tired of always being the positive one.
But let me compile some positives, just so you don't lose all hope in me :)
*If there was an emergency, I wouldn't want a distracted surgeon working on me (thanks Eggface!)
*By waiting an extra week I will have more money in my account to cover my cost so that I don't overdraft like I was going to.
*I will get to spend a very special day with a very special person that I wouldn't have gotten to otherwise because I would have been in the hospital.
*I get to watch the season premier of Jersey Shore tonight!
*I get another week of eating some food (still mostly liquids though)
*I have more time to mentally prepare myself
*Everything is already done and ready to go so I can feel more relaxed when the day finally does get here
*At least I don't live in Canada where the wait time for surgery is 10 years!
*I get to enjoy these really awesome storms we are having instead of being hospital bed ridden during them
*I can go swimming a few more times before the summer is over
*I can pick up my very heavy cat for 8 more days, which is good because she's been in a mood lately and has needed cuddles.
Right now my biggest stresses are re-arranging my time off work and having 9 less recovery days before school starts. I'm worried that I won't be feeling good enough to start my classes after only 10 days of recovery. We'll see :/ Other than that, I'm over the "shock" of a cancelled surgery. I promise tomorrow's post will be a bit more cheerful and back on track with a shake review and all :) Thank you all for your support and encouragement!
I just can't take the sad kittehs! Just want to grab them and squeeeeeze them!
ReplyDeleteDon't worry about being happy all the time or putting that vibe out lest you be judged. Sometimes I think people want everyone to be freaking Stepford wives! I know they do actually and I say F that!
Love ya. :)